Lang leve de NRA

[Lenny]

REPLY TO: D66 at nic.surfnet.nl

Lenny, een beetje moe van het MKZ, quotes Amerikaanse ironie...

"Because what this country really needs now is more bored undereducated
bitter terrified badly dressed pasty hate-spewin' suburban white women
from lost Midwestern towns with names like Frankenmuth all carrying
firearms and somehow thinking they're aiding the species.

Tiny paranoid squadrons of small-town moms and daughters who all believe
it's a big bad world packed with dread and thuggery and victimization
and you actually *need* to be scared because any day now the goddamn
gummint is coming to take your guns away and make everyone bow down and
become whimpering victims to the rapists and drug lords and liberals and
people with too much book learnin'.

And so what they need to do is all get together and go on a big shopping
expedition to Sock World and Kmart and Dress Barn and then go scarf some
deep fried cheese blintzes and a few Diet Pepsis at the Food Court, and
then go off shootin' together, just practice good sneering gun ownership
like the NRA suggests, because it's a dirty ugly world out there and you
never know when you're gonna need to protect yourself and blast some
bastard's face off for stealing your shopping cart or lookin' at you
funny.

It's a delightful little caricature and another self-mocking headline
come to life, as our fear-mongering strangely testosteroned ladies of
Michigan and Texas and Philly all huddle in their Second Amendment
Sisters chapters and compare barrel lengths and bullet flesh-rending
effectiveness and the best gauge of firearm to use so the recoil won't
break a nail or make one of your curlers fall out but will still will
send a nice titillating shiver down to the naughty parts where it
counts, just like the boys enjoy.

Because of course it's not that we need fewer guns in this country or
more restricted access, but rather a whole helluva lot *more* guns owned
by a wider variety of latently furious NRA zealots so everyone walks
around thinkin' everyone else is packing heat and therefore no one will
dare mess with anyone else for fear of getting their face blown off,
which of course isn't at all what would happen but the NRA can wet
dream, can't it?

Because wouldn't that be cool way for society to live, hell yeah just
like an old Clint Eastwood movie or some sort of mutated John Wayne
flick where people get blown away all the time and look all cool fallin'
down into the dirt in slo-mo and bleed to death or hemorrhage violently
from cool head wounds just like on ER and stuff.

It would be a beady-eyed proudly thuggish flag-wavin' place where the
men are men and the women are choleric polyester-pantsuited creatures of
misguided vigilante justice, and the young'uns are all out target
practicing on the dog and no one gives much of a crap anymore for grace
and education and civility and a nonviolent approach to the world,
because look where that's gotten us, nowhere dammit, everybody lock and
load and by the way anybody touches my eyeliner, I'll kill ya."

end quote
Met de groeten van Djzee Dubbeljoe

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